Wednesday, 16 January 2013

Kak Dibah is getting married!

This Sunday, my only daughter, Adibah, and my eldest is getting married! And I will be a mother-in-law to Hayat, a young man who works in an IT company in Cyberjaya and hails from Pahang. If you're a mother of an only daughter, you will probably be able to relate to this posting. After slightly more than a year's engagement, she is finally getting married! Is it wrong for me to say that I'm not sure how to be a mother-in-law? How should I act? The only people who have called me 'mama' are my two children :) And knowing me, I will probably be fumbling with words to speak to my future son-in-law :) It will need some getting used to I guess...

My feelings flip-flopped several times over the course of the year... between feeling embarrassed for acting like my daughter was only 18 and leaving home for the first time, to feeling joyful that she'd found her soul-mate...I haven't talked to anyone about my feelings. There's no one to talk to in school- the majority are young teachers the same age as my daughter and my close friends are all miles away. My heart aches out of happiness and sadness. Happiness because she is marrying the man she loves and will build a life of her own. Sadness because my only Kak Dibah is leaving...This house will be empty with only me and my other half. I don't know if I can get use to this to be honest.


With Kak Dibah everything is a first! I remember sending her to the kindergarten and how she took some time to get used to kindergarten. Soon after, it was her primary school. I wanted her to go to the best school in town badly- SK Tunku Mahmud (1), but I missed the deadline and so she ended up in SK Perempuan Bandar, an all girls school. This incident taught me a valuable lesson- not to miss the registration for her brother, Rasyad. Yours truly registered Rasyad a year earlier and he got to go to SK Tunku Mahmud (1). Now, her wedding is also my first!

Our trip to Bandung last year
I will miss our trips to Tebrau City (our favourite shopping place) and the tom yam lunch we usually have in Black Canyon, one of our favourite hang outs. Her favourite is tom yam fussili and she used to joke "You silly!" at me.  Last December was renovation and wedding preparations month. We went everywhere together- the furniture shop to discuss choice of cabinet ( I must say she has good taste!), Nilai 2, Ayer Hitam for hantaran things etc. etc. etc. Although my knees were a real challenge sometimes, we managed to get everything for her wedding amidst my marking the SPM and the renovation. I'm no super lady but the fact that I managed to handle everything from day one is God's blessings. Alhamdulillah...It's now only a matter of days before her dad gives her away to the man she loves. I'm excited and at the same time anxious. The exchange of vows will take place in the morning and the wedding reception in the afternoon on the same day. I truly hope everything will be smooth-sailing and that she will have a happy and memorable wedding.

With her only brother, Rasyad

Yes, we've had plenty of quarrels too-sometimes bitter ones but I guess this is normal between a mother and daughter. Through it all we have bonded and become closer. I've given the best that I knew how to her- education, love and care, attention. Lately she's been joking, "nanti dibah takde mama jangan nangis.." Well, I'm crying already...I just want her to be happy and successful in her married life and be granted good health always. Some friends teased that I will soon be a grandmother. Hey! I look forward to that day actually and I'm sure I will enjoy it to the fullest. I imagine myself to be a sporting grandmother and a doting one too :) In the meantime, I pray to God that her wedding will be joyous and blessed. Ameen.


May happiness be yours Kak Dibah!

Perhaps the wedding photos will comfort me when she's gone :)


The Thinking Teacher


  1. Congrats Kak Rahmah..I wish the best for Kak Dibah and no matter what, she will always be your baby girl..that's what my mom told me :) Lepas ni, tunggu timang cucu plak ;)

  2. Tx fadzleen! Her wedding was beautiful! In sya Allah when d time comes i hope i'll be a great grandma :)

  3. Salam Kak Rahmah,

    Congratulations! I'm sure the wedding was beautiful...hehehe. This is mazlina from mpm by the way...hehehe. I'm waiting for your daughter's wedding photos:)

    1. Hi Mazlina! Thought you've forgotten me hehe...thanks the wedding was beautiful Alhamdulillah. Will post some once we receive from the photographer.


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